When I met Rowland recently at "Boot Camp", he commented that I must have an interesting story to tell and directed me to this website. I am honored to be able to share with you some of my life story and perhaps to give you a glimpse of God's love.

I am a single mother with four delightful (most of the time) boys! I grew up as an M.K. (missionary kid) in P.N.G. and moved to Australia when I was 13 with my parents. Dad worked at a Baptist church as a pastor and later moved to another Baptist church where he pastored, until recently retired. I am one of four daughters, the eldest of twins.

My parents had high expectations of me, wanting the best for me, spiritually, emotionally and physically, so you might be able to imagine their extreme disappointment when I became pregnant during my H.S.C. year in a private girls school! They had made it clear to me from the start that they didn't approve of my boyfriend, but the unplanned pregnancy was swept under the carpet by a shotgun wedding!

This wedding was, of course, a total embarrassment for me.The hired dress looked as cheap as the budget and despite the discretion with which everything was handled there was much bemusement and little joy. Perhaps the greatest "joy" was on the wedding night when my new husband and I could have "legitimate" sex without the previous feelings of guilt.

Six months later my little son was born and thrived, despite great hardship, financial and emotional.When my husband left us there was a lot to celebrate and a lot to grieve! Unfortunately I did not turn to Jesus then and after being thrown out of one church and unwelcomed in a couple of others I decided to turn to a life of adventure to find my happiness.

I became quite "alternative", pursuing a lifestyle of travel and irresponsibility. I took my son with me everywhere I went and even mangaed to collect three more children along the way. Today my boys are aged 17, 13, 8 and 5.

I smoked a lot of cigarettes and dope, chased the dragon and dabbled in speed and other drugs, including alcohol. I managed to escape any prison sentances or convictions, however, following a brief return to the church, met with and lived in a defacto with a heroin addict. Despite his addiction, by boyfriend was an intelligent, sociable person who was well liked and we stayed together for a long time. We have two wonderful sons. I distinctly remember a social worker saying to me one day that in these sorts of relationships, either the second party also becomes an addict or the couple seperate because it is impossible to sustain over a long period of time. I was co-dependant on 'him" , supporting him through numerous prison terms and moving in and out of many residences. Always moving on because God wouldn't let me settle!

One day I heard Christian radio in my kitchen and today I am evidence of the fact that faith comes from hearing and hearing from the Word of God! Through Christian radio I began to meditate on Jesus and the Bible. God literally broke into the darkness of my miserable existence, broke my bonds and set me free!

The day I rejoined the church is memorable for me. My family had never rejected me and were constantly praying for me. When I joined into a small group of women meeting toigether to support each I felt so inadequate, so alienated from them. I cried tears of repentance as I saw my true condition in the light of God's grace and mercy.

That was five years ago. I have chosen to walk in obedience to Christ. I left the worldly relationship I was in as well as all of my addictions. I chose to actively participate in church services and activities. I have pursued wholistic healing through prayer, retraining of my mind, accountability, counselling, sheer determination and discipline! It has not been easy, but I know there are times where God has carried me. He has most certainly always been there for me.

I can testify to miracles. I have seen angels. The boys and I have never been without a roof over our heads or a meal on the table. I am drug free and have been for many years now.My addictions have been removed. My sexuality has been restored. I am content to nestle in my heveanly father's arms. I have heard God whisper my name. I know His voice. He has provided me with secure housing and has given me purpose and fulfilment. I have led several ministries at church including an outreach in some of the worst public housing in our city and a group for single parents that outreached into the community. I have enjoyed helping with foodbank and running a coffeeshop. At present I am studying at Bible College, working as a court networker in a Magistrates Court, as well as writing a book about some of the amazing people I've had the pleasure of meeting.

When I look at my strong, handsome, sporty 17 year old, I see God's provision. When I see my 13 year old, my heart swells with God's love. When I catch a view of the freckles of my 8 year old's delightful face I see God's creation and when my 5 year old looks into my eyes, i see God's promises! I haven't much worldly wealth, but my children are "my gold"!

God is good to me and has forgiven my past. I choose to no longer live in it. He has called me and I have responded. I am so happy.

When I see you, I hope you can see only Jesus.