A laugh for you

You have to hope that this study is flawed, but the evidence seems irrefutable. Several months ago, scientists at Europe's annual human reproduction conference suggested that the results of a recent analysis revealed the presence of female hormones in beer, and suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption.

The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women.

To test the theory, 100 men were each fed six pints of beer within a one-hour period. It was then observed that 100 per cent of the men; - gained weight - talked excessively without making sense - became overly emotional - couldn't drive - failed to think rationally - argued over nothing - had to sit down while urinating - couldn't perform sexually - and refused to apologise when wrong.

No further testing is planned.