Christian Cliches from http://www.angelfire.com/pa/greywlf/christiancliches.html

1. "THE WISDOM OF THE WORLD" OFFICIAL DEFINITION: Ideas contrary to God's revealed truth, conceived by Satan the deceiver and accepted by those who reject God

REAL DEFINITION: Any idea that is contrary to the teachings of one's own church. Especially suspect if arrived at through rational means. (Kevin Hedges)

3. "SATAN HAS DECEIVED YOU"

A. If you still don't believe after my crystal clear explanation of salvation then I'll have to blame a third party for your lack of perception.

B. Thank God the Israelites propagated belief in Satan. What a great catch-all statement for things I can otherwise rebut or defend.

8. "YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE THINGS OF THE LORD IF HIS SPIRIT DOESN'T DWELL WITHIN YOU" (a) I'm special. I'm saved. I understand spiritual things now because I have become spiritual. You don't understand. You're not saved! You're not spiritual like me.

You can understand spiritual things too once you ask Christ to come into you heart (...and spend a couple of years allowing me and the other brethren to condition your mind daily to think the same way we do). ... 11. PRAISE THE LORD!

Used when something good happens by attributing it to the Lord, like getting a new car or getting out of the hospital. It is never used, though, if someone dies or a plane crashes and all the passengers are killed. This is only used when the Lord does good stuff. ... 13. SCRIPTURE CAN ONLY BE UNDERSTOOD BY THOSE WHO HAVE BEEN BORN AGAIN OF THE SPIRIT OF GOD.

Used by the Christian who is at a loss to explain a particular scripture quoted by an unbeliever.

The irony of this statement is apparently lost on them, since in order to be born again, one must first have some understanding of Jesus as depicted in the scriptures. (Thanks Robert B.)

ALSO

The above concept is taken from the following scripture and is used extensively by born again Christians to prove that an "unbeliever" cannot understand the bible:

"But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned (1 Co. 2:14)."

This is doublespeak (and doublethink) for: "My ideas are superior to yours because mine come from God, and yours don't; so even if my ideas seem irrational or are non sequiturs, they are better than yours."

14. WE WORSHIP A GREAT BIG GOD WHO CAN DO WHATEVER HE WANTS. SO WATCH OUR OR HE MIGHT JUST GET TIRED OF YOU, TOO! FEAR HIM, BECAUSE HE CAN DESTROY BOTH THE BODY AND THE SOUL IN HELL!

OK! Enough of the "Love Of Jesus" stuff. Your constant rejection of my testimony and beliefs is beginning to turn me right off. I hope you take my threat seriously because I'm at a loss to know what else to say. If I were God, I would kill you right now.