An explanation of SPIRITUAL DIRECTION Barry, W & Connolly, W: The Practice of Spiritual Direction, (Seabury, NY)

1982

pp.4-5 – What SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is not:

a.. asking the person for more information and trying to help them understand the causes of their malaise

b.. sympathetic listening and offering of encouragement

c.. helping a person see the consequences of their state in life and how those consequences might dictate a course of action (to solve the problem)

d.. helping a person better understand who God is (eg not a harsh task master but loving God)

e.. referring the person to someone else with more knowledge or skill.

All these may be helpful and valid but they are not SPIRITUAL DIRECTION.

What SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is. a.. p. 5 – ‘SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is concerned with helping a person directly with their relationship with God and the underlying question, “Who is God for me and who am I for him?”‘

b.. p.6 – ‘The spiritual director helps the directee to address God directly and to listen to what God has to communicate. The focus of this kind of SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is the relationship itself between God and the directee. The directee is helped not so much to understand that relationship better but to engage in it, to enter dialogue with God, who is self-communicating.’

c.. p.8 – ‘We define Christian Spiritual Direction as help given by one Christian to another which enables that person to pay attention to God’s personal communication to him or her, to respond to this personal communicating God, to grow in intimacy with this God, and to live out the consequences of the relationship. The focus of this type of SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is on experience, not ideas, ie any experience of the mysterious Other whom we call God. Moreover, this experience is viewed not as an isolated event, but as an expression of the ongoing personal relationship God has established with each of us.’

d.. p.10 – confusion over the term which may carry images of authoritarianism, loss of personal responsibility and an understanding of the human being as a bodiless spirit.

Theology, Church history and SPIRITUAL DIRECTION a.. p.18 ‘Christians are a community of believers who influence one another’s faith and experience and life. And Christians rest their faith on authority: the Bible, Church Fathers, Councils, creeds, church hierarchies. But Christians have always been asked to appropriate what authority states, to say “I believe”‘. This leads to personal experience. ‘The question still remains: How can I, on the basis of my experience, say with assurance, that I believe?

b.. p.19. Theologians like Berger, Rahner and Lonergan argue that ‘the very human experience which is in question is paradoxically the place where we will find an answer (to existential questions).’ ‘The search for a rock upon which we could ground our search for meaning has led us to the realisation that attention to inner experience, is of central importance.’

c.. p.20 The role of SPIRITUAL DIRECTION is to help seekers come to assurance that God communicates, cares and saves ‘by giving God a chance to demonstrate his care and concern to them and by helping them to pay attention to their inner experience (of God).’

d.. p.21 ‘Lonergan’s theological method grounds itself not on deductions from some set of first propositions, but on religious experience, the experience of being in love with God.’ ‘This focus on religious experience … will heal the (12-13C. scholastic) rift between dogmatic theology and spirituality.’

e.. p.22 ‘The apostles (nb Paul’s conversion) came to believe in Jesus and to trust in him through their experience of him.’ ‘They did not come with a preconceived picture of him that was later substantiated.’ (Indeed their pre-conceptions were smashed.) ‘Their experience of him led them to raise questions about him and then enabled them to answer those question.’ (Both authority – scripture – and experience are intertwined – ie, paradox)

f.. Athanasius in his ‘The Life of St Antony’ (pp. 19-20), ‘spoke of him beginning his journey not because he came to a conclusion based on sound thought but because he heard the gospel proclaimed to him … as words addressed to him (personally).’

g.. p.23 ‘Early Christian literature contains many other such incidents… an expectation that God would deal with people as he was shown dealing with them in the Bible. The experience of dialogue with God, did not, for them, cease with the ascension of Jesus.’

h.. ‘Clement of Alexandria described Christian life in terms of the Word as paidagogus, whose task was not primarily academic – the schoolmaster taught the child his school subjects – but a companion who spent much time each day, helping him learn through companionship itself. To Clement’s mind the Word, Christ, does this for us. The servant and child formed a relationship that drew on the affective resources of both.’ see ‘Clement of Alexandria, Christ the Educator

i.. p.24 ‘In anyone’s life, dialogue with another person close to him changes as both people grow … Clement encourages us to assume the same will be true of the relationship with Christ.’

See also ‘To Diognetus’ – ‘From coming to know and love him who first loved you, the person learns how to live … not through conformity with laws.’

a.. p.25 ‘The liturgical setting of over 1,000 years in which the Scriptures were delivered to the community, itself encouraged people to listen with their hearts and feelings as well as their minds. The affective hearing of the word would itself be an experience closer to what we mean by religious experience. Closer too than the discussion of the word of God that in most recent centuries became the substance of homilies.

b.. ’12thC Aelred of Rievaulx in his When Jesus was 12 Years Old, moves spontaneously from describing Jesus’ adventure in the temple to speaking directly to him.’

c.. p.26 ‘William of St Thierry, like other medieval writers had a high respect for knowledge, but he believes that love knows too, and that finally the person knows God through loving him.’ (see his Exposition of SofS)

d.. p.27 Ignatius, while respecting the Church and study, also chose this course.

Spiritual Direction Explained

a.. p.32 Terminology in conversation in SPIRITUAL DIRECTION must be that of relationship, not theological or psychological. The desire we have is like that of a person who does not know their family (eg adoptees) – feelings of rootlessness, aloneness, being lost may show itself in powerful suppressed feelings or more specific and expressed yearnings.

b.. p.34 ‘By contemplative prayer we mean the conscious willingness and desire to look at and listen to God as he wishes to be for me and to respond to him.’

c.. p.35 ‘Prayer is no more difficult than the formation of any deep, enduring, trustworthy relationship, and no easier. … If you converse with a person for a half hour several times a week about personal subjects, you soon find that either a close relationship has developed or that something is wrong between you and the other person.’

d.. cf the Bible – ‘a record of God’s expression of his attitudes towards us. Yahweh speaks with tenderness, dismay, anger, concern.’

e.. p.36 ‘The gospels, in particular, are written in such a way that they elicit reaction. It is only in terms of this eliciting of reaction that they can be properly understood. … The word expresses a living being who wants to engage in dialogue with us. The more explicit and specific (and honest) the response is, the more readily the dialogue proceeds.’

f.. p.37 ‘The dialogue takes place, then, between the living word and the responsive hearer of the word. It is not, even when Scripture forms its basis, a study session, though prior study can add to its richness. Study can become a substitute for dialogue and so thwart the dialogic purpose of the word.’

g.. The best ‘candidates’ for this type of prayer ‘are as real as rain, fog and sunshine. They want to let God be himself to them. They have strong desires for intimacy and they make good friends and lovers. They are responsive people and so can be responsive to the word.’

h.. p.44 ‘If SPIRITUAL DIRECTION performs its proper task, it must help people to recognise and focus their lives as response to God’s loving, creative and saving action.’… ‘Study (of theology, the Bible etc) may fascinate but … exist outside the growth, risk, shakiness, joy, and depression Christians experience, and so leave their hearts untouched.’

The Role of the spiritual director a.. p. 31 ‘Directors do not create relationships between God and their directees; they try to foster such relationships. Our assumption is that he wants to relate … God does not need anyone to help him relate.’

b.. p.46 ‘The fundamental tasks of the spiritual director are: First, helping the directee pay attention to God as he reveals himself; Second, helping the directee recognise his reactions and decide on his responses to this God.’

c.. p.47 ‘Though not complex, it is not easy either. … humans have difficulty in paying attention to anyone else … and paying attention to the invisible, mysterious, and all-powerful God.’ The director is there to help the directee ‘pat attention’ to the movement of the Holy Spirit.

Contemplation explained a.. p.48 ‘… not here using the word in its mystical meaning (but)

in a sense that is closer to the meaning Ignatius gave it when he proposed in his exercises that a person look at Jesus as he appears in the gospel and let himself become absorbed in what he is like, what he cares about, and what he is doing. … He lets himself be absorbed in the other person.’ (even if only slightly and briefly).

b.. p.49 ‘If you have ever been so absorbed in watching a game, reading a book, or listening to music that you have been surprised at how much time has passed, by how cold or hot you are, by the anger of a friend who has been asking a question for a few minutes, then you know the power of paying attention to something, and you have a personal example of a contemplative attitude. Parents have been so concerned about their children in an accident that they become aware of their own injuries only after the emergency has ended.’

c.. ‘Contemplation is an experience of transcendence – ie, forgetfulness of self …’

d.. p.50 – To help a highly self absorbed person, the spiritual director may need to start helping the person to focus on anything else – eg, music, natural beauty, art etc.

e.. p.52 ‘After doing this we ask them to reflect on the experience and share it with the Lord.’

f.. p.54 – re contemplating the creation – ‘Creators (artists) like to have people show interest in what they have done … moreso if we express delight in their presence. Such responses are elicited by what we contemplate, not willed by us.’

g.. p.59 ‘Contemplation (paying attention to the Lord, usually in Scripture) produces, all by itself, sprouts of love, affection, and desire; and these in turn lead the person to look more closely at the Lord … can gradually bring about a new trust or companionship.’

h.. p.60 Morton Kelsey, God, Dreams and Revelation, (Minneapolis, Augsburg, 1975), ‘points out that many of the Church Fathers used dreams in their Spiritual Direction.’ There is a broad range of privileged places where directees can wait for the Lord to reveal himself.

i.. p.62 ‘The praying person has the sense that he is not controlling the way the Lord seems to him. Someone else is setting the direction of the relationship, deciding its events. The praying person does not look for helpful thoughts, work up feelings, or concoct images. He simply looks to the Lord as he appears in Scripture or in experience, puts himself before him as he is and lets happen what will happen.’

j.. p.63 ‘”Contemplative” often suggests repose to us, but it can be a wrestling match … he may find that the Lord seems vague and distant.’

‘The anti-contemplative bias is so strong that when contemplation is described, many inevitably think: “Real life is too complex and difficult for a lot of people, so he’s encouraging them to withdraw into the world of the mind, where reality is simpler and easier to control.” This is precisely not true … The person … becomes more wholly, deeply, and passionately involved in the Lord’s concern for his people and their needs. The only element likely to be lost is egocentricity.

a.. p.71 ‘Unaccepted feelings can also come into consciousness obliquely: “I could feel very sad and discouraged about it but that would be dumb.” Because he feels sadness is improper, the person does not let himself notice that he is sad. Instead he reflects on its ‘unreasonableness’ and the sadness goes unnoticed and prevents him from listening to the Lord and responding. The director could respond, ‘You’re telling me how you think you should feel. But how do you feel?’

Qualities of a SPIRITUAL DIRECTOR a.. p.123 Trust between director and directee is vital. ‘The kinds of people likely to engender trust are … not perfect but relatively mature. They show signs of having engaged in life and with people. They are optimistic but not naive, good humoured, but not glad handers. They have suffered but not been overcome by suffering. They have loved and been loved and know the struggle of trying to be a friend to another … for whom they care deeply. They have experienced failure and sinfulness – their own and others’ – but seem at ease with themselves in a way that indicates an experience of being saved and freed by a power greater than the power of failure and sin. They are relatively unafraid of life with all its light and darkness, all its mystery.’

b.. p.126 – warmth, spontaneity, commitment to and effort to understand the directee.

c.. p.128 Self confidence but also some fear and trembling in the face of the Holy and their capacity to make mistakes (humility)

d.. p.129 Spiritual Director’s need to be aware of the fact that they have social, political, cultural and theological biases which may impact; also need for them to have friends who are not directees to prevent them using directees to fulfil needs for personal satisfaction, security and friendship.

e.. p.130 They need to be unafraid of strong emotions and the mysterious.

Director and directee at commencement a.. p.135 ‘The spiritual director needs to be a sacramental sign of God’s loving care’ – therefore his being is more important than his knowledge.

b.. p.142 ‘A working alliance whose only purpose is the development of the relationship with the Lord’ – no other hidden agenda (even involving moral failings – though such issues might be raised openly by questions re whether directee has raised with Jesus the compatibility of immorality with relationship with Jesus). Such matters need to be left to others in the Church to handle.

c.. p.150 Need to ascertain directee’s actual experience of prayer; his desire now; his image of God.

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