Here are the winnners of the M-LAW competition for wackiest warning label of the year:

1st prize Do not use for personal hygiene – on a toilet brush

2nd prize This product moves when used – from a child’s scooter

Previous winners have included:

* Remove child before folding – on a baby’s buggy

* Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally – on a digital thermometer

* Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating – on an electric hand blender

* Harmful if swallowed – on a three-pronged brass fishing lure.

* Do not use this product as a toy, pillow, or flotation device – on a bag of air used as a packing material

* Do not use as a ladder – on a 30cm tall CD rack

* Never iron clothes while they are being worn – on a household iron

* Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire – on a smoke detector

* Do not eat toner – on a laser printer cartridge

* And on a pair of cyclist’s shin guards – Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

New Scientist’s Feedback regularly publishes absurd product warnings, and other funny real-life tales. For more amusement, visit newscientist.com/lastword at:

http://www.ProcessRequest.com/apps/redir.asp?link=XbjdfbdhCJ,ZbjhdjbijeFB&oid=UcjjbCB&iclitemid=XbgbbgfbCB&tid=WbijfcbCG

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