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TODAYS RIDDLE:
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Alive without breath,
as cold as death,
never thirsty,
ever drinking,
when tired, never winking.
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What is it?

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A Fish
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The Easterner had always dreamed of owning
his own cattle ranch, and finally made
enough money to buy himself the spread of
his dreams in Wyoming.
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"So, what did you name the ranch?" asked
his best friend when he flew out to visit.
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"We had a heck of a time," admitted the new
cowboy. "Couldn't agree on anything.
We finally settled on the Double R Lazy L
Triple Horseshoe Bar-7 Lucky Diamond Ranch."
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"Wow!" his friend was impressed. "So, where
are all your cows?"
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"None of 'em survived the branding."
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Moishe is driving in Jerusalem. He's late for
a meeting. He's looking for a parking place,
and can't find one.
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In desperation, he turns towards heaven and says,
"G-d, if you find me a parking place, I promise
that I'll eat only kosher, respect Shabbas, and all
the holidays."
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Miraculously, a place opens up just in front of him.
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He turns his face up to heaven and says,
"Never mind, I just found one."
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A factory owner said to a store owner,
"Thank you, Mr. Smith, for your patronage.
I wish I had twenty customers like you."
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"Gosh, it's nice to hear that, but I'm kind of
surprised," admitted Smith.
"You know that I argue every bill and always pay late."
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The factory owner said, "I'd still like twenty
customers like you. The problem is, I have two hundred."
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A guy walked into his friend's office, he found him
sitting at his desk, looking very depressed.
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"Hey, what's up with you?" he asks.
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"Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She's hired
a new secretary for me."
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"Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?"
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"Neither, He's bald."
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More and more computer science majors at U.S. colleges
are opting not to take programming jobs after they graduate.
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Not because they don't want to work in the computer industry,
it's just that they want to spend a few more years in America
before having to move to India.
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The error in this URL has been corrected.
If you've tried to connect and couldn't, please try again.
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http://www.gift4grandchildren.com
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http://www.iShopInt.com/mall.asp?ID=shoponline
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If you would like to be included on my "Clean Humor"
list, send a blank email to jhmaida[at]hotmail.com with
"=Include Me=" as the subject. I do not write the jokes.
I only pass on the ones I think are funny. Laughter is
good for the immune system.
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