TODAYS RIDDLE :
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Just before Christmas, there was an honest politician, a
kind lawyer and Santa Claus travelling in an elevator of
a very posh hotel. Just before the doors opened they all
noticed a $100 bill lying on the floor. Which one picked
it up??


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Santa of course, the other two don't exist!
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We were building a house on a South Carolina beach.
One day I forgot to bring a hammer with me, and stopped
by a little country store. Several men were sitting around
a potbellied stove, and one rose as I walked in.
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"Do you have any hammers?" I asked.
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"You want to buy one or borrow one?" he drawled.
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"Buy one." "Then I got hammers," he said.
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QUITE COLD!
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The Indians asked their Chief if the winter was going
to be cold or not.
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Not really knowing an answer, the chief replies that
the winter was going to be cold and that the members
of the village were to collect wood to be prepared.
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Being a good leader, he then went to the next phone
booth and called the National Weather Service and
asked, "Is this winter to be cold?" The person on the
phone responded, "This winter was going to be quite
cold indeed."
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So the Chief went back to speed up his people to
collect even more wood to be prepared. A week
later he called the National Weather Service again,
"Is it going to be a very cold winter?" "Yes", the
weather person replied, "it's going to be a very
cold winter."
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So the Chief goes back to his people and orders
them to go and find every scrap of wood they
can find. Two weeks later he calls the National
Weather Service again: "Are you absolutely sure
that the winter is going to be very cold?"
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"Absolutely," the person replies, "the Indians are
collecting wood like crazy!"
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"Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the modish
young lady.
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"What's to be proud of?" asked the old man.
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The young lady replied, "I noticed that when you sneeze,
you've learned to put your hand in front of your mouth."
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"Of course," explained Grandpa.
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"How else can I catch my teeth?"
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This guy says to his buddy, "You'll never believe what
happened last night."
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His buddy says. "Well then, tell me what happened."
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The guy says, " Last night the doorbell rang, and when
I opened the door, there was my ex-mother-in-law on
the front porch. She said, "Can I stay here for a few days?"
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I said, "Of course, you can," and I shut the door."