TODAYS RIDDLE :

A magician is standing on a concrete floor holding a raw egg with his hand outstretched. Without the aid of any objects, he is able to drop the egg two feet without breaking it's shell. How does he do it?

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He simply holds the egg higher than two feet, and then releases the egg. The first two feet it will fall without breaking. . ========================== . The other day I needed to call home, but the only pay phone I could find was in use. So I stood to the side and politely waited until it was free, thinking it would only be a couple of minutes. Five minutes went by, and still the man was on the phone. He was just standing there, not saying a word. Two more minutes went by, and he still wasn't talking. . Finally, I tapped him on the shoulder and asked if I could use the phone. I really wouldn't be long, but needed to make an important call. . "Hold your horses," he responded, covering the receiver. "I'm talking to my wife." . ========================== . A blonde pulls over at the gas station, gets out of her car, opens the hood, and checks the engine oil. . After a few seconds of intelligent thinking, she takes the dipstick in her hand and, raising her chest high, walks up to the attendant. . "Excuse me sir, but can I buy a longer dipstick?" . "May I ask why you need a longer one ma'am?" . "Because this one isn't long enough to reach the oil!" . ========================== . There were two guys on a motorcycle driving down the road. The driver was wearing a leather jacket that didn't have a zipper or any buttons. . Finally he stopped the bike and told the other guy,"I can't drive anymore with the air hitting me in my chest." . After thinking for a while he decided to put the coat on backwards to block the air from hitting him. So they were driving down the road and they came around this curb and wrecked. The farmer that lived there called the police and told them what happened. . The police asked him,"are either of them showing any life signs?" . The farmer then said, "well, that first one was 'til I turned his head around the right way." . ========================== . Here's an old Henny Youngman joke from the archives : . Morris needs a lawyer, so he grabs the yellow pages and picks out a law firm ---Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz. . He calls up and says, "Is Mr. Schwartz in?"

The man says, "No, he's out playing golf." . Morris says, "All right, then let me speak to Mr. Schwartz." . "He's not with the firm any more, he's retired." . "Then let me talk to Mr. Schwartz." . "He's away in Boston, won't be back for a month." . "Okay, then let me talk to the other Mr. Schwartz." . He says, "Speaking!"