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Humor

English as she is spoke

A Polish man moved to the U.S. and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well, until one day he rushed into a lawyer’s office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him, “very quick.”

The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Lawyer: “Have you any grounds?”

Polish Man: “Ja, Ja, acre and half and nice little home.”

Lawyer: “No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?”

Polish Man: “It made of concrete.”

Lawyer: “Does either of you have a real grudge?”

Polish Man: “No, we have carport, and not need one.”

Lawyer: “I mean, What are your relations like?”

Polish Man: “All my relations still in Poland.”

Lawyer: “Is there any infidelity in your marriage?”

Polish Man: “Ja, we have hi-fidelity stereo set and good DVD player.”

Lawyer: Does your wife beat you up?”

Polish Man: “No, I always up before her.”

Lawyer: “Why do you want this divorce?”

Polish Man: “She going to kill me.”

Lawyer: “What makes you think that?”

Polish Man: “I got proof.

Lawyer: “What kind of proof?”

Polish Man: “She going to poison me.

She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.

I can read and it say, Polish Remover.”

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