A simple view of the main 'mid-life crisis' goes like this:

The wife and mother seeks security first, significance second - until the 'empty nest' looms and she goes back into the workforce. The husband and father seeks significance first, security second - but when he's 40-45 he's attained his occupational goals or realizes he's never going to. So the male then begins to get in touch with the feeling/emotional side of his nature - and his mortality (male friends are starting to have heart attacks). He reaches out to his kids, but they're independent now. And to his wife, but she is receiving significance in the workplace. Sometimes he becomes a surrogate father-figure to his younger secretary, and so a 'spouse trade-in' occurs. Meanwhile, his wife is fed up with being in her husband's shadow. 'I want to be a person in my own right,' she hears herself saying.

These tensions ought to be talked through with a counselor or wise

friend. Many marriages break up which could have held together if only a positive course-correction in the new relationship had been negotiated wisely and lovingly.

Such life-changes, Lord, sometimes creep up on us unawares, and they are difficult to understand. We are not well prepared for them. So whatever life-stage I'm in, Lord, help me to trust you anyway. Amen.