(1) They say the ideal marriage is that between a deaf husband and a dumb wife (Which does seem like overkill)
(2) A man was sitting on a river bank fishing when a loony popped his head over the high wall of the asylum just behind him -
Loony: “What are you doing?”
Man: “I’m fishing.”
Loony: “How long have you been there?”
Man: “Six hours.”
Loony: “Caught anything yet?”
Man: “No.”
Loony: “Come inside.”
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