I was gazing in a newsagent's window yesterday, at a rack of those funny plaques, and this one struck me as rather unique:

"I've gone to find myself. If I get back before I return, keep me here."

For pure rubbish, it seems hard to beat, yet is seems to make "sense" well, grammatically.

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Naughty/Noughty Nonsense

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I went in search of Nothing,

But Nought is what I found,

Much of Nix, and Nil, and None,

And Silence, lost in Sound.

I came across a Zero,

And floundered 'round in Zilch;

I saw that I was Naked,

But No clothing did I filch.

I am a total Nobody,

A complete Nonentity.

I'd dwell in Land of Nowhere,

But I am Not to be.

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