A teenager once asked pianist, Arthur Rubinstein, for his autograph. Knowing he doesn’t sign autographs, after the concert the teenager held out a pad and pencil and said to the great musician, “I know your fingers are tired, sir, but mine are, too–from clapping.” He got his signature.

Somebody remarked that the task of a preacher is to comfort the afflicted and to afflict the comfortable!

A woman with a very nasty attitude had spent almost two hours browsing through the store. The longer she shopped, the more she complained and criticized. finally she said, “Why is it, I never get what I ask for in here?” “Perhaps Madam,” sad the exhausted clerk, “it’s because we are too polite.”

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