Much discussion about rape involves whether it is motivated not so much by sexual desire as by the need for power. I have subscribed to this newsgroup for six months, and I have seen this issue mentioned several times, but not discussed in great detail. Now Julie B, in a different thread, writes this: Rape is not usually about sex, it is about control. The rapists seeks to be in control and uses sex as the means to dominate. The urge to rape lies in the mind, NOT in the sexual organs. You could castrate every known rapist alive, but that would do absolutely nothing to quell a rapists desire to dominate. rape is a violent act not a sexual act. Sex is only the weapon.

Although I have some agreement with that, I think it is a serious exaggeration. There may be some rapists who seek to "excuse" their actions by saying that they were overwhelmed with desire, and could not help themselves. I do not think that would be an excuse anyway, but that is not the point here. The point is that rapes in these circumstances are probably not the majority. If Julie's argument is that most rapes are committed by men who could easily control themselves if they chose to, then I would not disagree, and I think the point needs making. But that is a far cry from saying that the rape is initiated by a desire to dominate. I think that a big part of the motivation behind rape probably comes from the desire by a man to have his own way. A lot of people, women as well as men, get upset and resentful when they do not get what they want, whether it is sex or anything else.

Exaggerate this in a selfish and potentially brutal man, and if a woman he desires refuses sex, he may be motivated to insist he gets what he wants anyway. I believe it is the case that a large proportion of rapes are committed in social circumstances, by men who know their victims. I suspect that they would not rape at all, if they did not already want sex in the first place. This desire would have nothing to do with domination or power. Then, when they are refused, their anger at being told "No" becomes the primary motivation, even though their sexual desire was only moderate, and itself controllable. Crucially, this is not a desire to dominate others, it is an extreme desire to have your own way. The appalling selfishness and criminality of their actions lies in the fact that they are prepared to inflict so much hurt to achieve that end, or that they are so self-centred that they really do not know how much distress they are inflicting. Sex is not "being used as the means to dominate".

Violence or force, or some form of compulsion, is being used to achieve a desire, which happens in this case to be sexual desire. So while I sympathise with some of the spirit behind Julie's views, I think it is a distortion to say that rape is primarily about the desire to dominate. I have yet to see any compelling evidence that the majority of rapes originate elsewhere than in a desire for sex. Maybe I will see such evidence in response to this post. That is why I have posted it.

Regards, Philip.