Once upon a time there was a husband who woke his wife every morning with a loud, noisy fart. I mean, this guy really exploded! The bed shook, the windows rattled, the pictures on the wall slipped sideways..... It was so disgusting, and every time she complained he laughed. And she would say to him, "One of these mornings you're going to fart your guts out!" And he would laugh again.

Then Thanksgiving Day arrived. Before dawn, before her husband woke up, his wife tip-toed downstairs to the kitchen to start preparing the turkey for the house full of company that would be arriving later in the day. She reached inside the turkey, and pulled out the juicy, slimy stuff.... and suddenly had a bright idea. Filling her hand with it, she tip-toed back upstairs to the bedroom, lifted the covers from where her husband was sleeping on his belly, pulled his pajama bottoms, and very carefully dropped the slimy stuff inside his pajamas. He never stirred for a moment. Then she quietly tip-toed down to the kitchen again and continued her work.

Suddenly she heard him explode. The windows rattled, the whole house shook, the pictures slipped sideways on the walls..... And then there was complete silence.

Half an hour later her husband came into the kitchen, his face all red, his body trembling. "You were right, honey," he said with a quavering voice.... "You were right, and this morning I really did fart my insides out.

And do you know, it has taken me an entire half hour to get them back inside me again....."