The day finally arrived: Forest Gump dies and arrives at the Pearly Gate, where he is met by St. Peter, himself. The gate is closed, and Forest approaches the gate keeper.

St. Peter says, "Well, Forest, it's certainly good to see you. We've heard a lot about you. I must inform you that the place is filling up fast, so we've been administering an entrance exam to everyone. The tests are short, but you must pass before you can enter Heaven."

Forest responds, "It shore is nice to be here, St. Peter. I been lookin' forward to this. Nobody tole me about any exams. Shore do hope the test ain't hard; life were a big enough test."

St Peter explains,"Yes, I know Forest; but, the test I have for you is only three questions. First, What days of the week begin with the letter T?" Second, how many seconds are there in a year? Third, what is God's first name?"

Forest goes away to think about the questions. He returns the next day and approaches St Peter to answer the questions. St Peter asks, "Now that you have had a chance to think about the questions, tell me your answers."

Forest replies, "Well, that first one, how many days of the week begin with the letter T; shucks, that one's easy; that'd be Today and Tomorrow!"

St Peters's surprise shows, and he exclaims, "Forest! That's not what I was thinking, but ...you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I give you credit for your answer. How about the next one? How many seconds in a year?"

"Now that there one's harder," says Forest, "But, I thunk and thunk about it, and I guess the only answer is twelve."

Astounded, St Peter says, "Twelve? Forest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forest says, "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve; January second, February second, March second..."

"Hold it", interrupts St Peter, "I see where you're going with this, and I guess I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind, I'll give you credit for that one, also. Let's get to the next and final question. Can you tell me God's first name?"

Forest says, "Well,shore, that's easy, I know God's first name. Everybodys gotta know it. It is Howard."

"Howard?, asks St Peter. "What makes you think it's Howard?"

Forest answers, "Why, it's in the prayer."

St Peter asks, "What prayer?"

"The Lord's prayer. Our father, who art in heaven, Howard be thy name!"