1. Well, aren’t we just a ray of *!#*!* sunshine?

2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?

3. Do I look like a *!#*!* people person?

4. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting.

5. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

6. You! Off my planet!!

7. Practice random acts of intelligence & senseless acts of self-control.

8. I like cats too. Let’s exchange recipes.

9. When I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you.

10. And your crybaby whiny opinion would be…?

11. I’m not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

12. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?

13. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

14. Earth is full, Go home.

Related Articles:

• Church Squirrels
• Humour: Why Teachers Drink!
• Humo[u]r
• English: a crazy language!
• What to do with your enemies

This work, unless otherwise expressly stated, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 Australia License.