Christmas (Religious) Toys Capitalism: ` He who dies with the most toys, wins. Judaism: He who buys toys at the lowest price, wins. Socialism: Everyone deserves one toy each, at government expense. Liberalism: I like playing with toys, don't you? That's why I think I'll go to heaven. Catholicism: He who denies himself the most toys most often, wins. Anglicans: They were our toys first. Orthodox: No, they were our toys first. Polytheism: There are many toy makers. Evolution: The toys made themselves. Communism: Everyone gets the same toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours. Metropolitan (Gay) Church: Ignore the toy's gender so we'll eventually eliminate ourselves. Coptic: Pray all night for your toy to come. Taoism: The toy is as important as the abacus as the tractor. Voodoo: Please let me borrow your toy for a minute. Hinduism: He who plays with bags of plastic farm toys, loses. 7th Day Adventists: He who plays with his toys on a Saturday. Wins. Skeptics: Toys don't exist, regardless of the evidence. Salvation Army: My toys are your toys, are our toys, set to music. Baptists: We've played with these toys this way for years. We're not going to change. Churches of Christ: When we play with toys, everyone's in charge. Brethren: Girls may play with toys, as long as they don't talk about it. Pentecostalism: He whose toy can talk and jump and is multilingual, wins. Confucianism: Once a toy is dipped in water it is no longer dry. Nondenominational: Who cares where the toy came from, let's just play with them. Islam: If Muslims don't want them, then infidels can't have them either. Christian Science: Toys are a figment of your imagination. Society of Friends: He whose toys make no noise, wins. Atheism: There is no toy maker. Amish: Toys with batteries are a sin. Presbyterian: Those toys were chosen for you to play with and these were chosen for me to play with. Apostolic: There is only one toy and it is in our church. New Age: There are no bad toys and no bad toy players. Uniting Church: Toys are toys are toys are toys are toys are toys. Assembly Of God: It doesn't matter how you play with the toys so long as more people join in with us. Name-It-Claim-It: I have toys. I have toys, I have toys, I have toys, I have toys. Word of Faith: Send me $1,000 and I will tell you how you can have more toys. ~~~ More toys: http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/7557.htm
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