Christmas (Religious) Toys Capitalism: ` He who dies with the most toys, wins.

Judaism: He who buys toys at the lowest price, wins.

Socialism: Everyone deserves one toy each, at government expense.

Liberalism: I like playing with toys, don’t you? That’s why I think I’ll go to heaven.

Catholicism: He who denies himself the most toys most often, wins.

Anglicans: They were our toys first.

Orthodox: No, they were our toys first.

Polytheism: There are many toy makers.

Evolution: The toys made themselves.

Communism: Everyone gets the same toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.

Metropolitan (Gay) Church:

Ignore the toy’s gender so we’ll eventually eliminate ourselves.

Coptic: Pray all night for your toy to come.

Taoism: The toy is as important as the abacus as the tractor.

Voodoo: Please let me borrow your toy for a minute.

Hinduism: He who plays with bags of plastic farm toys, loses.

7th Day Adventists: He who plays with his toys on a Saturday. Wins.

Skeptics: Toys don’t exist, regardless of the evidence.

Salvation Army: My toys are your toys, are our toys, set to music.

Baptists: We’ve played with these toys this way for years. We’re not going to change.

Churches of Christ: When we play with toys, everyone’s in charge.

Brethren: Girls may play with toys, as long as they don’t talk about it.

Pentecostalism: He whose toy can talk and jump and is multilingual, wins.

Confucianism: Once a toy is dipped in water it is no longer dry.

Nondenominational: Who cares where the toy came from, let’s just play with them.

Islam: If Muslims don’t want them, then infidels can’t have them either.

Christian Science: Toys are a figment of your imagination.

Society of Friends: He whose toys make no noise, wins.

Atheism: There is no toy maker.

Amish: Toys with batteries are a sin.

Presbyterian: Those toys were chosen for you to play with and these were chosen for me to play with.

Apostolic: There is only one toy and it is in our church.

New Age: There are no bad toys and no bad toy players.

Uniting Church: Toys are toys are toys are toys are toys are toys.

Assembly Of God: It doesn’t matter how you play with the toys so long as more people join in with us.

Name-It-Claim-It: I have toys. I have toys, I have toys, I have toys, I have toys.

Word of Faith: Send me $1,000 and I will tell you how you can have more toys.

~~~

More toys: http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/7557.htm

http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/7552.htm

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