‘The best ideas/help/words I ever got from anyone to help me survive were:

1. They listened to me without interrupting.

2. They did not express doubt or disbelief by their words or body language.

3. They did not try to "fix" me or "make it all better"

4. They did not tell me what I should do – or not do…

5. They gave me the dignity and respect to figure out options, to process my issues and
dysfunctions at my own pace.

6. They encouraged me to figure out those options and work the issues and dysfunctions
as I could deal with them, when I could deal with them.

7. They did not tell me "get on with your life" or "get a life" or
"it’s over, forget about it"

8. They acknowledged the pain and the impact of abuse in my life.

9. They accepted me as I am, warts and all.

But above all else – *they listened*

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